Fox News: Keeping America Misinformed

HARK! AND REJOICE!

A full Year has passed since the Flaming fist of Weatherbox squashed the Reign of the terror Boomsnake! A new Weatherholiday to celebrate! Let us all remember their Tails quickly retreating between their legs! Let us remember the Sounds of Trumpets blaring as they scurried Back to their Cave in Brooklyn! Hark! Boomsnake No More! Rejoice! A Thousand year reign for Weatherpeople!

More On Egypt

Here's a good summary of the action from Rachel Maddow's show last night, for the visual learners out there:

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

One thing really stands out here, although it shouldn't be surprising: what incredible fucking hubris it must take for the American President to talk about "what's needed" in Egypt right now, and for that message to basically be for the Egyptian citizens to calm down. Everything that I have read that has come out of the Obama administration in the past few days can do nothing but hurt them in the eyes of the Egyptian citizens and the new government they eventually install. From Hilary Clinton to Joe Biden to President Obama, all's comments have been positively dripping with condescension. Then again, there also seems to be a good, not unjustified, amount of fear that underscores their remarks. If there is indeed a new government instituted in Egypt (and there's really no doubt that there will be at this point) it is very likely that it will not be remotely as subservient to US/Israeli interests as Mubarak's government was. As I said before, it's no secret either here or in Egypt that the US has supported Mubarak's dictatorial regime. Furthermore, it has been revealed that the government is using tear gas against Egyptian citizens that is (and is branded as being) made in the USA.

In a great article at Salon, Philip Weiss calls this Obama's 9/11: "the day Arabs blindsided a president." There are indeed parallels in the scrambling to capitalize behind closed doors in the White House, I'm sure. Only, optimistically, the logical conclusion of this would seem to be the opposite of that of 9/11, in which the government used the attack as pretext to invade and militarily take control of sections of the Middle East, and, with the aid of the media, create a prevalent and enduring climate of fear and Islamophobia. Rather, this time, as Weiss puts it:

"The danger to America and Israel is that the Egyptian revolution will destroy this false choice of secular dictator-or-crazy Islamists by showing that Arabs are smart articulate people who can handle real democracy if they get to make it themselves."

This is absolutely an occasion to celebrate, and a strong rebuke of the Bush and Obama administrations' assertion that we're the only people who can take down the Bad Guys and it's our "responsibility" to do so. On the contrary, this is an example of a people taking down their Bad Guy in spite of the US.

One last note for now. There is a particularly disgusting claim I keep hearing on CNN, propagated prominently by other Middle Eastern dictators who are no doubt in a profound state of fear right now, that the uprising is a result of some foreign plant. It's shameful and absurd that the US press has been even treating this seriously. Here's what Weiss says on the matter:

"I thought this is what he wanted for the Arab world: democracy! But the market dropped, and the cable shows are filled with mistrust of the Arab street. Our talking heads can't stop talking about the Islamists. Chris Matthews cried out against the Muslim Brotherhood and shouted, Who is our guy here? -- as if the U.S. can play a hand on the streets. While his guest Marc Ginsberg, a former ambassador to Morocco whose work seems to be dedicated to finding the few good Arabs out there, said that forces outside Egypt are funding the revolt -- a grotesque statement, given the homegrown flavor of everything we have seen in the streets; and when Matthews pressed him, Ginsberg said, Hamas... Iran."

This is really more pathetic than anything else, as anyone with any knowledge of the recent uprisings that have spread to every major city in Egypt now seems to be saying, it's already far too late for anything to stop or slow the tremendous momentum of the recent days' accomplishments.

Oh, and finally, there are protests going on in many US cities now as well, as people call for the government to withdraw its support of Mubarak. So look into that if you live in a large city and are interested in joining in or simply going and watching these protests. I know for sure people are protesting in front of the UN.

IT'S CURTAINS

The desperation of a powerless regime. We all ought to know now what to think of the pleasant-sounding phrases so many world leaders like to use:

"The president said that change can not be achieved through chaos but through dialogue."

"Mubarak urged calm, adding that only because of his own reforms over the years were people able to protest."

Lest anyone take the latter claim seriously, these reports from nearly two months ago should help to elucidate the heretofore grim political reality of life in Egypt, including the fact that, "in Egypt it's illegal for more than five people to gather in one place."

A few more quotations:

"This is a country whose policy is directed towards small elites that are enjoying the country's resources, in short. You know. And when you have nothing to give, there is nothing but the police, there is nothing but brutality, there is nothing but oppression, there is nothing but detention centers and torture and so on. The regime is strong, and we have to be stronger."

"I think one advantage, which I hope would reflect on the way people struggle to change this regime, is to realize that Parliament in a police state is not the way to change."

It's obvious that the protesters, who are heroically intransigent, will not continue to accept the presence of a hateful dictator like Mubarak (though whether he is in fact a dictator is apparently still an unresolved question for some people), even or rather especially after the pitiful and hypocritical offers to dismiss his cabinet and implement other reforms. As one protester aptly put it: "We want Mubarak to go and instead he is digging in further. He thinks it is calming down the situation but he is just angering people more." Were it not for the fact of his dictatorship, which has ruled under emergency law for its thirty-year duration, talk of "dialogue" might make sense. But with his cynical and despicable casting of suspicion on the protesters themselves ("part of a bigger plot to shake the stability and destroy legitimacy" of the political system) and his defense of his own security forces' violently brutal crackdown on the protests, his presentation of himself as a potential interlocutor for the furious dissidents can be taken seriously only by the likes of, say, Hillary Clinton.

Short of more violent measures that will only further de-legitimize his rule in the eyes of every decent person in the world, there is no way Mubarak will be able to hold on to power, and his "reaching out" to protesters to supposedly engage them in some kind of conversation is transparently just that: an effort, as it has already been said, "to dig in further" in clinging to the autocratic authority which has brought such stability to the region.

Edit: Here is the best and most jubilant conversation about the events in Egypt that I've seen on a television news program thus far. You get a sense of just how world-historical this moment is when the people this woman is interviewing laugh in her face after she asks the predictable, statist question of who will lead Egypt if Mubarak is overthrown.

http://english.aljazeera.net/watch_now/

Egyptian Uprising

In addition to, and partially as a reaction to, the expulsion of the Tunisian dictator that was the result of mass uprisings in the capitol of said country, thousands of Egyptians are now taking to the streets feeling newly empowered to rid themselves of their own oppressive dictator, who is the recipient of even more US support than the now former Tunisian dictator. Egypt has been perhaps the United States government's favorite "partner" in the Middle East, with the obvious exception of Israel. They have been an ally of the US initiated "War on Terror" from very early on, and have reaped copious amounts of both political and monetary benefits as a result. The US support of Tunisia was not incredibly well known to people who don't pay close attention to these things, so it was relatively easy for the State department to hide behind vague praise of the Tunisian people's assertion of basic human rights, which, of course, the US ALWAYS supports. While it's unclear where that country's government is headed in the aftermath of the revolution, the US has offered to help get the country "on track" both economically and politically (see Naomi Klein's The Shock Doctrine).

This Egyptian uprising, however, is going to be much trickier for the United States to navigate politically. The friendliness of the US and Egyptian governments is absolutely no secret at all. When President Obama went to give his first speech in the Middle East, in which he preached Understanding and Working Together Despite Our Differences, he made the speech in Cairo. The US administration(s) has on multiple occasions pointed to the country, and it's dictator, as an example of a Middle Eastern government to be used as a model. So what will they say now that the world is seeing how oppressed that country's citizens feel by the contested regime? So far, this is what we have from Secretary of State Hillary Clinton:

"Clinton minced no words, suggesting Egypt's government had to act now if it wanted to avert a similar outcome and urging it not to crack down on peaceful protests or disrupt the social networking sites that help organize and accelerate them."

"'We believe strongly that the Egyptian government has an important opportunity at this moment in time to implement political, economic and social reforms to respond to the legitimate needs and interests of the Egyptian people," Clinton said in a statement with Jordan's Nasser Judeh at her side.

"'We urge the Egyptian authorities not to prevent peaceful protests or block communications including on social media sites," Clinton told reporters in the most blunt comments to date by the United States urging Mubarak to undertake reforms."

As predictable and tepid a response as one could expect: "Give them a few little freedoms and get back to business as usual," along with the long time favorite reference to freedoms of speech, which manifests itself chiefly in social networking sites on the internet these days (By the way, did anyone else think it was absolutely absurd not only that Obama cited Facebook as a shining beacon of American industry in the 21st century, but that Congress applauded when he did so? Hell of a year for Mark Zuckerberg.). And although Reuters claims that Clinton "minced no words" in the above statement, this quote is much more frank:

"We support the fundamental right of expression and assembly for all people, and we urge that all parties exercise restraint and refrain from violence. But our assessment is that the Egyptian government is stable and is looking for ways to respond to the legitimate needs and interests of the Egyptian people."

Responses by the US government in situations such as these is pretty much cut-and-paste, but rarely comes out that strong in support of embattled dictators. Then there's the ever-present plea for a "refrain from violence," which ignores a few facts. First, without any violent acts it would be almost impossible for these people to be heard and taken seriously as a threat by their government. Secondly, that in situations where citizens come out en masse to voice their dissent, violence is often exacerbated, if not initiated, by the state's police forces and/or army. Finally, that these are the exact same tactics used by American police whenever there are anti-government demonstrations on US soil. Sure, the American government has never blocked the use of social networking sites to prevent citizens from organizing, but they have never had to. And there is every reason to suspect that they would if they did perceive a need to, judging by their reaction to WikiLeaks, when they bullied all sponsors and servers into rescinding their support, and making sure that supportive citizens could not lend theirs.

So this will definitely be something to keep an eye on, particularly, in Tunisia, what kind of government comes out of the ruins of the previous one. What history leads me to guess is that the Tunisian people will be granted a few more social freedoms, but the economic situation will remain mostly the same. However, the uprisings in Egypt do add a note of hope to the process, especially since the complaints of the Egyptian people seem to hit much closer to the core of things, as their main source of outrage seems by and large to be the economic system and the immobility and poverty it engenders.

Update: The situation is escalating constantly in Cairo. Follow it here.

Chances that an American Indian will die before the age of 45: 1 in 3

U.S. Office of Technology Assessment

Estimated percentage change in the size of Canada’s Native-American population since 1500: +22

Library of Indian Affairs (Quebec)/U.S. Bureau of Indian and Northern Affairs

Estimated percentage change since then in the size of the Native-American population of the U.S.: -76

Library of Indian Affairs (Quebec)/U.S. Bureau of Indian and Northern Affairs

Estimated percentage change in the Native American population of California during the 1850s: -65

Russell Thornton, American Indian Holocaust and Survival, University of Oklahoma Press (Norman)

Percentage change, since 1980, in the number of people calling themselves “American Indian” on the census: +38

U.S. Census Bureau (Suitland, Md.)

Percentage change, since 1983, in the number of Harvard freshmen identifying themselves as “Native American”: +100

Harvard University (Cambridge, Mass.)

Number of U.S. presidents besides Bill Clinton who have made an official visit to an Indian reservation since 1937: 0

Bureau of Indian Affairs (Washington)/Franklin Delano Roosevelt Library (Hyde Park, N.Y.)

Number of American Indian tribes that own a casino license: 90

National Indian Gaming Commission (Washington)

Number that are members of the InterTribal Bison Cooperative: 28

InterTribal Bison Cooperative (Rapid City, S.D.)

Percentage of households on U.S. Indian reservations that have phone service: 47

Federal Communications Commission

Chance that a black woman living in the U.S. will be a victim of violence this year: 1 in 18

Bureau of Justice Statistics (Washington)

Chance that a Native American woman will be: 1 in 10

Bureau of Justice Statistics (Washington)

LOLz For Your Sunday

Judge Rules White Girl Will Be Tried As Black Adult

Morbid Curiosity Leading Many Voters To Support Palin

This Day In History: The Invention Of The Handjob

H. Rollins, Militant for Net Neutrality

R.I.P. Countdown With Keith Olbermann

Literally without warning or even hint, Keith Olbermann announced tonight that this would be his last show on MSNBC. Whether this has been in the works since Olbermann's pretty silly suspension in November for donating to Democratic candidates, or has anything to do with the recent takeover of NBC Universal by Comcast (which many have claimed is sure to be horrendous for people who watch cable), no one knows, but I'm sure we'll see. As far as political commentators on cable go, Olbermann has been a very refreshing presence. He has been persistently attacked by Republicans as an extremist on the left, and has been someone that they point to when people criticize Glenn Beck. Of course, this is a false equivalency on a number of levels. What has been true is that Olbermann has been unafraid to stake out a claim further to the left than almost any Democrat on cable, and has refused to bind himself to the constraints of civility when his political opponents are constantly throwing nasty words whose meanings they do not know in his direction, which is more than you can say for almost any Democrat who is also a public figure these days. Personally, Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow are the only political commentators that I ever watch on TV, so MSNBC just cut my interest in their network in half (which will surely get them to rethink this entire situation, I'm sure). Olbermann will be replaced by the absolutely unbearable Lawrence O'Donnell. Here's hoping CNN picks up Olbermann real quick, and he isn't banished to the abyss of radio. I would miss his salt and pepper colored hair, cool glasses, physical similarity to Portland's mayor Sam Adams, and the things he does that I just mentioned. Here's his goodbye:

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Apocalypse Watch: Cheeseburgers I Mean Cows Are Now Dying Too, Plus Cloning

"200 cows were found dead Friday on a farm in Portage County, Wisconsin. The dead cows had to be removed with semi-trucks. The rest of the farm has not been quarantined, as officials say no threat is posed toward humans or other animals, according the The AP."

"Tests are still underway to determine what is responsible. See WSAW's full video report here."

So, yeah, 200 dead cows, unexplained causes, but definitely no further threat to animals or humans. Just really good, very well reasoned research and reporting. Additionally, continuing the conspiracy theory-infused, paranoid tone of this post, human scientists are now trying to resurrect the mammoth in the belly of an elephant, which sounds to me like it could only result in the creation of a monster, if it actually results in the creation of anything at all.

Finally, this video of Jon Stewart talking about the ridiculousness of Sarah Palin pretending that she is a victim and that people are trying to "silence her" when people on networks that aren't Fox News are constantly begging her to come on their nationally syndicated networks and talk, and she is saying no like crazy. Tenuous connection to the rest of the post, sure, but I don't want to make two posts and you can't make me.

"Semi-authoritarian regimes, regimes that allow some freedoms, as it were, can last longer. They can absorb opposition, they can withstand criticism and so on..."

Gettin' Based

Lil' B blowin' up:

http://destructural.wordpress.com/2010/07/28/thank-you-based-god-on-the-importance-of-lil-b/

Suit for the Mouseface video

PS tour went well

Highlights From This Months Harper's Index

Percentage change since 2004 in the median household net worth of members of Congress: 22

Percentage of US GDP last year that went to federal job-training and job-search programs: 0.05

Percentage that went to unemployment insurance: 1

Portion of voters in the midterm elections who ranked "spending to create jobs" as their highest priority for Congress: 2/5

Factor by which Joe DiMaggio's 1950 salary exceeded the mean U.S. family income: 26

Factor by which Derek Jeter's 2010 salary did: 288

Percentage of the pedestrians stopped in 2009 for random searches in Philadelphia who were black: 71

Percentage of the city's population that is black: 44

Percentage of the stops that didn't lead to an arrest: 11/12

Miles from land and maritime borders that the U.S. Border Patrol can legally perform warrantless searches: 100

Portion of all Americans who live within that area: 2/3

Number of times George W. Bush's memoir refers to his loss of the 2000 popular vote: 0

Percentage change since 2008 in the number of confirmed gonorrhea cases in Alaska: +71

Between that last stat and Bristol Palin's celebrity-enhancing teenage pregnancy, I think we can safely say that Alaskans need some more practical and thorough sex advice than the inverse of that Nike slogan. Hit me up, Alaskans, I got some great tips.

Today In Earth Shaking News: Your Zodiac Sign Probably Isn't What You Think It Is

If you were happy with your sign, this is almost sure to bum you out. If you were/are really into astrology, this is going to induce a serious identity crisis. But, hey, life goes on, you know? Just roll with it, and be flexible like me, a newly ordained Gemini (which truly fits my personality infinitely better than my previous, misguided match: Cancer.) Here's how this shift in identity condescension came about:

"A recent Harris Poll found that 31 percent of Americans believe in astrology. They're wrong -- although not necessarily in the way their detractors might cite.

"The ancient Babylonians based zodiac signs on the constellation the sun was "in" on the day a person was born. During the ensuing millenniums, the moon's gravitational pull has made the Earth "wobble" around its axis, creating about a one-month bump in the stars' alignment.

"The result?

"'When [astrologers] say that the sun is in Pisces, it's really not in Pisces," said Parke Kunkle, a board member of the Minnesota Planetarium Society.

"Indeed, most horoscope readers who consider themselves Pisces are actually Aquarians. So instead of being sensitive, humane and idealistic, they actually are friendly, loyal and inventive.

"Or not."

Here's the new, updated chart, in case you're curious about who you are.

Capricorn: Jan. 20-Feb. 16.
Aquarius: Feb. 16-March 11.
Pisces: March 11-April 18.
Aries: April 18-May 13.
Taurus: May 13-June 21.
Gemini: June 21-July 20.
Cancer: July 20-Aug. 10.
Leo: Aug. 10-Sept. 16.
Virgo: Sept. 16-Oct. 30.
Libra: Oct. 30-Nov. 23.
Scorpio: Nov. 23-29.
Ophiuchus:* Nov. 29-Dec. 17.
Sagittarius: Dec. 17-Jan. 20.

* Discarded by the Babylonians because they wanted 12 signs per year.

Another Congressman (From My State) Receives Death Threats

Guess what party he belongs to?

From the DoJ:

"CHARLES TURNER HABERMANN, 32, of Palm Springs, California, was arrested this morning after being charged by federal criminal complaint with threatening a federal official. HABERMANN is alleged to have made two expletive-laden, threatening phone calls to the Seattle office of Congressman Jim McDermott on December 9, 2010. In the first call recorded on the office answering system, HABERMANN threatens to kill Congressman McDermott, his friends and family. In the second call HABERMANN says he will hire someone to put Congressman McDermott “in the trash.” HABERMANN was interviewed by the FBI on December 10, 2010, regarding the calls to Congressman McDermott, and another threatening call made to a California Congresswoman. HABERMANN is expected to make his initial appearance today on the 3:00 p.m. calendar in federal court in Riverside, California."

This congressman, who was a practicing psychiatrist for 20 years before getting involved with politics, was interviewed by the Seattle Stranger in the wake of the Arizona shooting last week and had this to say:

Was he surprised, given the tone of American political discourse, that the shooting occurred? “I can’t say I was surprised," McDermott said. "I can’t say that I expected it, or that I had any inkling of anything, but knowing what I know professionally... As I’ve watched the political process over the last couple of years, I’ve been troubled a number of times, knowing that there are people—from a professional standpoint I know there are people out there—that there are people being stirred up by this."

Does he think it's reasonable to suspect that heated political rhetoric may have contributed to Loughner's alleged actions? “This happened, not because of Gabrielle Giffords, but because somehow she became not a human being," McDermott said. "She became an object. She was dehumanized. And once you start doing that to people, you can do awful things to people who are dehumanized—that’s the troubling aspect to this sort of rhetoric. You see it and you say, 'Man, you’re just egging people on.' All this stuff about 'Take my country back'—all these things. Somehow we have stopped having the ability to sit down and talk.”

Any other specific rhetoric that he's found troubling? How about the Sarah Palin target map that's been much discussed in the last few days? "People can judge for themselves whether things are good or bad," McDermott said. "But I would say that anything that incites people to think that it’s alright to hurt somebody is not within the pale of acceptable rhetoric. And I really find there has been a general coarsening of the discourse in this country over the last ten years. To pick out any particular thing, I think, is not useful. Everybody’s got to stop.”

Typically, efforts to politicize tragedies like this make me want to vomit, and, it should be added, this shooter in Arizona does appear to be an apolitical, mentally disturbed person. However, that doesn't stop Rush Limbaugh from claiming that he's obviously a Democrat "because he liked Mein Kampf," or Democrats from citing Sarah Palin's now-infamous target map. That being said, whether it impacted this person or not, it is simply a fact that the dangerous, violent rhetoric is coming predominantly from one side of the political spectrum. It is an anger of impotence, greed, lust for power, and an absolutely childish need to get what one wants all of the time. Compare the worst things that Sarah Palin, Rush Limbaugh, and Jim Boehner have said about Democrats and the worst things that Keith Olbermann, Nancy Pelosi, and Harry Reid have said about Republicans and you will see a completely different rhetorical spectrum. On the one hand you have Glenn Beck saying, "I think I'm going to kill Michael Moore, I wonder if I could do it alone or if I need help" and on the other you have pointed, though often angry, critiques about someone else's inability to govern effectively. Anger itself is not the problem (there's obviously plenty to be angry about where American politics are concerned), and can in fact be a good thing when pointed in the right direction. What's toxic is the mix of misguided anger and violent rhetoric. Lest you think that Republicans have learned from their mistake, and are prepared to scale back the violence and hate, Sarah Palin is here to squash your hopes:

"It is in the hour when our values are challenged that we must remain resolved to protect those values. Recall how the events of 9-11 challenged our values and we had to fight the tendency to trade our freedoms for perceived security. And so it is today."

A more disgusting analogy, I could not imagine. But why should we be surprised? She created the website with bullseye targets over Congresspeople's offices DAYS after a string of Democrats' (including Gabrielle Giffords) offices were vandalized, and when some of those Senators themselves were receiving death threats, with the title "Don't Retreat, Reload!" written in every notice about it. This is all that people like Palin, Beck, and Limbaugh have going for them, so don't expect them to ever back off. With that in mind, I don't know what the end game is here. We'll see, I guess. But, once again, it's very clear that this is not simply a "everyone needs to be more careful" situation, as the media and politicians would have you believe. The scales are not balanced, and the culprits are very easily identifiable. If there is a way to root out the messages of violence, and to prevent more tragedies like the Arizona shooting, it is not by letting the progenitors of that message off the hook.

Edit: Here is an excellent article by Andrew Sullivan on Palin's reprehensible response to the tragedy. Most appalling: her use of the phrase "blood libel" to characterize her critics. I couldn't bring myself to watch the video of her actually saying these things, so if you've got a stronger stomach than I do, let me know what you think.

Apocalypse Watch: Mass, Unexplained Animal Deaths

2012, here we come. This is one of the more shocking things that I have read in a while, and a sure sign that all is not well on Spaceship Earth. From the Huffington Post:

"Millions of dead fish surfaced in Maryland's Chesapeake Bay in the U.S., Tuesday, while similar unexplained mass fish deaths occurred across the world in Brazil and New Zealand. On Wednesday, 50 birds were found dead on a street in Sweden. The news come after recents reports of mysterious massive bird and fish deaths days prior in Arkansas and Louisiana.

The Baltimore Sun reports that an estimated 2 million fish were found dead in the Chesapeake Bay, mostly adult spot with some juvenile croakers in the mix, as well."

"ParanaOnline reports that 100 tons of sardines, croaker and catfish have washed up in Brazilian fishing towns since last Thursday. The cause of the deaths is unknown, with an imbalance in the environment, chemical pollution, or accidental release from a fishing boat all suggested by local officials.

"In New Zealand, hundreds of dead snapper fish washed up on Coromandel Peninsula beaches, many found with their eyes missing, The New Zealand Herald reports. A Department of Conservation official allegedly claims the fish were starving due to weather conditions.

"While all three events are likely unrelated, they come after recent reports of mysterious dead birds falling from the sky in both Arkansas and Louisiana. Thousands of dead birds were found in Beebe, Arkansas on New Year's Eve, and a few days later, around 500 of the same species were found 300 miles south in Louisiana. A Kentucky woman also reported finding dozens of dead birds scattered around her home. In the days prior to New Year's, nearly 100,000 fish surfaced in an Arkansas river 100 miles west of Beebe. Officials are now saying that fireworks likely caused the Arkansas bird deaths, and power lines may be to blame for the death of the birds in Louisiana.

"Some remain skeptical of the explanations. Dan Cristol, a biology professor and co-founder of the Institute for Integrative Bird Behavior Studies at the College of William & Mary, told the AP that he was hesitant to believe fireworks were to blame unless "somebody blew something into the roost, literally blowing the birds into the sky."

"The events are likely unrelated, however, and the BBC notes that this is the third year in a row thousands of dead devil crabs, also known as velvet swimming crabs, have turned up on the coastline near Kent, England. It is estimated that 40,000 of the dead crabs have washed up on the beaches this year.

"According to LiveScience, experts believe cold weather is to blame for the massive crab deaths. Tests conducted in past years have turned up no results for disease or similar problems, leaving the cause an unexplained mystery, though hypothermia is conjectured."

Sorry, government scientists, but you'll forgive me for being a little skeptical that all of these "events" are completely unrelated, and that fireworks would kill thousands of birds, and that because the mysterious deaths of tens of thousands of crabs is now a fucking trend, it's automatically unrelated to other species dying off en masse. Possible? Yes. But probable, given the ever-accruing mass of evidence that our climate and, by extension, planet is gradually coming more and more to resemble a toxic cesspool? Nah, brah. Has anyone even heard of this?

Imagine That! A Book By Don DeLillo That Isn't Completely Obnoxious!

And, in fact, is actually really remarkable! Usually, I end up needing to take a cold shower and maybe even shed a few bitter tears of dissatisfaction after reading a novel by this particular titan of post-modern literature. Really, without fail, this happens every time. I'm always incredibly off-put by the seeming inability on DeLillo's part to give his characters voices that are at all distinguishable from each others, the fact that human characters seem to take a back seat to the discrete bits of information that Don DeLillo seeks to wow you with in his attempt to show you just how well he understands The Times We Live In, and frequently gag when reading sentences that seem to constantly be saying, "See what I did there?". So, imagine my surprise and delight when I didn't experience any of these things in his new, short novel!

The novel is only 117 small pages, with moderately large font, and the economy of words really suits DeLillo well (as opposed to say, the sprawling smugfest that was Underworld). The book is about three people in an isolated house in the desert in California, having conversations, both directly and subtextually, about the absurdity of human concerns in the context of geologic time and space, as well as the growing prevalence of a societal death drive. The novel calls to mind Cormac McCarthy a bit, which I suppose is just a result of the remarkable fact that McCarthy seems to have a patent, these days, on existential themes presenting themselves in barren landscapes.

All things considered, I'd say this was one of the top three novels released last year, that I read (Along with Jonathan Franzen's Freedom, which is the clear number one on this list, and in fact the best book of fiction of the young millennium, according to me, and Nicole Krauss's Great House.) You really won't regret picking this up. And if you do regret it, it will only have taken up around two hours of your life! So there's that.

Has Anyone Ever Actually Read Pitchfork's Review Of Kid A?

It goes like this:

I had never even seen a shooting star before. 25 years of rotations, passes through comets' paths, and travel, and to my memory I had never witnessed burning debris scratch across the night sky. Radiohead were hunched over their instruments. Thom Yorke slowly beat on a grand piano, singing, eyes closed, into his microphone like he was trying to kiss around a big nose. Colin Greenwood tapped patiently on a double bass, waiting for his cue. White pearls of arena light swam over their faces. A lazy disco light spilled artificial constellations inside the aluminum cove of the makeshift stage. The metal skeleton of the stage ate one end of Florence's Piazza Santa Croce, on the steps of the Santa Croce Cathedral. Michelangelo's bones and cobblestone laid beneath. I stared entranced, soaking in Radiohead's new material, chiseling each sound into the best functioning parts of my brain which would be the only sound system for the material for months.

The butterscotch lamps along the walls of the tight city square bled upward into the cobalt sky, which seemed as strikingly artificial and perfect as a wizard's cap. The staccato piano chords ascended repeatedly. "Black eyed angels swam at me," Yorke sang like his dying words. "There was nothing to fear, nothing to hide." The trained critical part of me marked the similarity to Coltrane's "Ole." The human part of me wept in awe.

The Italians surrounding me held their breath in communion (save for the drunken few shouting "Criep!"). Suddenly, a rise of whistles and orgasmic cries swept unfittingly through the crowd. The song, "Egyptian Song," was certainly momentous, but wasn't the response more apt for, well, "Creep?" I looked up. I thought it was fireworks. A teardrop of fire shot from space and disappeared behind the church where the syrupy River Arno crawled. Radiohead had the heavens on their side.

I kid you not, that is an actual review. Someone call the Cake Police.

Best Album of 2K10

http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/8186033/

Let our kids worry about it

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1287643/Human-race-extinct-100-years-population-explosion.html

TOP TEN RECORDS OF 2010: THE YEAR WE MAKE CONTACT

GOOD YEAR FOR MUSIC, BAD YEAR FOR HUMANITY, ONE YEAR LEFT, 2k12



1. Shipping News- One Less Heartless to Fear


2. The Fall- Your Future, Our Clutter


3. Enemies- We've Been Talking



4. Swans- My Father Will Guide Me Up a Rope to the Sky


5. Joanna Newsom- Have One on Me


6. Envy- Recitation


7. Vague Angels- The Sunny Day I Caught Tintarella di Luna for a Picnic at the Cemetery


8. Buke and Gass- Riposte


9. Fight Fair- California Kicks


10. My Disco- Little Joy